Equilibrium

As the days grow incessantly darker and the year draws its finish line, I find myself tired from 2009's events, as well as challenged by the complex thought processes that have passed my way recently.
It seems that the people who perform well generally are people who are enthused to keep a balance of all their interests and duties, combined with a consistent ability to push themselves in every sense. They also seem to have a strong rationale about them, but interestingly always seem to adapt their thoughts and actions to what's deemed as "appropriate" behavior in every situation.
The particular thought processes that have been cycling round in my head are that of the questionable force of rationalisation. The ability to defeat fear, maintain a fast progression rate and adapt in both spontaneous and long term situations are controlled by it - so it appears to be an extremely relevant and productive topic to me in Parkour and in general.

I don't see how I am incapable of pushing myself to do things that others can do, yet I think that it is important to never judge your progression against someone else's. This leads me to think I'm being hypocritical and I have a contradictive nature about my belief system. But then I realise we are all like this... and, again, it's those who can balance their analytical outlook on themselves with their self belief and appraisal that seem to benefit most from life.

There are many more thoughts as specific as the one above, with the same doubts arising from them - how can we be truly balanced in every sense so that it stays balanced. I remember, though, an article on handbalancing that began with an introduction about the concepts of physical equilibrium. It noted that things like chairs or tables have a static equilibrium (an ability to stay in one position at all times because of its static centre of gravity balanced against the earth) but that living mass such as our own bodies can become out of balance very easily, therefore need to be capable of coming back into balance. Everyone wobbles in a handstand, but successful handbalancers' have gained the ability to overbalance or underbalance according to the situation they might find themselves in - maintaining a state as close to equilibrium as possible.

In the same way, then, thoughts and beliefs my be perceived to be living matter which one must build the ability to balance in any given situation, throughout the course of time. You never stop learning.
By turning those mental matters into physical visualisations, maybe it is easier to picture the state of equilibrium (or lack of it) we are in at any point. For example, when you are angry, by deciding that the anger is not productive or rational but you can't seem to dispense with it, try imagining yourself on a bar. The bar represents the well-being of your life - all your aims and things you relate to having a good life are supporting it. There is no end to the rail, only yourself in this present state of balance on it. The anger, though, has you made lapsed your co-ordination and your foot has gone slightly too far off the centre of the bar. You are therefore struggling to keep on the bar, and if you look down there is much more chance you will fall off. So I'm told, the best way to stay on the bar is by remaining focused on the bar and by slowing down and relaxing - this way you're goal still lies on the rail, and you have not given up.

My point is that I have come to realise that even though I may become confused or even agressive towards myself in the future, I know it is important to remain focused on the goals I strongly desire (the bar) and not to be distracted by anyone else's bar or the ground, as it were. The bar is my path, my superobjective, and within it lies my potential and my purpose. So it is healthy to remain constantly open-minded and keep analysing myself in every way, but it's only healthy if it's balanced out with everything else surrounding me. Only then will I be able to achieve a bloated potential as well as develop my understanding of the world and myself.

Specifically, it is not healthy to monitor my progress against others, but I must accept the desire to do so as a flaw in human nature that I must work hard to keep my values balanced with. All the other thoughts of this manner can be rationlised in the same way, if seen as the "wind" that is limitless and unpredictable, challenging my balance as I try to maintain a state of equilibirum on the bar.

Balance = the ability to hold a position without wobbling.

But everybody wobbles.

Every day is a struggle, I think that being true to yourself should be the first thought of every day. Every day brings fresh situations that should be tackled with an eternally widening wisdom. Everything is progression.

2009 has certainly been a year to remember, and I foresee 2010 as being much better.

I can't wait to find out!

xx